Early morning hell

So lately ive been waking up at like 6am to start the routine for school which starts next week on the 18th. Its only been one day and i cant make it past like 5pm without wanting a nap. ugh! I have too much on my plate but i love it all at the sametime i just have to find a way to balance it all somehow. I mean ive got D getting ready for his program on the 18th and then starting school in sept. i gotta buy all his school stuff. and then miss Ella worrying about her and the possibily of surgery is just freaking me out, then starting babysitting on the 25th all right after me having surgery. and then im also tryin to plan a wedding in all that khaos. LOL but i love it and hate it...its a love hate relationship if you ask me. I just hate having to do it all myself, sometimes i wish i could have a little bit more help. Yeah i know i dont always ask for help but thats usually more cuz i feel that if i ask for help im failing in i guess my self esteem as a parent but in the back of my head im screaming and pulling my hair out. and wishing for just a half an hour to myself just to recharge somedays.

Anyways im heading to bed its too late already
Nite nite